Thursday, March 27, 2008

This much is true

I've always been quite envious of the one-time NME hack and now Radio 2 DJ Stuart Maconie (and I can remember a time when such a career trajectory would have seemed beyond the realms of feasibility) who was responsible for creating the urban myth that dapper game show supremo Bob Holness played the saxophone solo on Gerry Rafferty's 'Baker Street'.

In retrospect, it was a brilliantly crafted porky, not least because Holness has several genuine claims to fame, what with him being the first radio James Bond and the father of one of proto-Girl-Power combo Toto Coelo and all; with a CV like that, one more wacky attribute could easily slip through unnoticed. But I can't believe that the story was crafted as a result of such cold-eyed reasoning; it was just the random collision of two cultural phenomena, creating a stopover on the spectrum that links 'surreal' with 'idiotic'. And it happened to work. Actually, I was more impressed by his story that Roxette had to change their name in the Philippines, because it means 'constipation' in Tagalog, but that one didn't have the same sort of sticking power.

You see, in the world of creative fibbery, you just can't tell what's going to last. Which is why my attempt to secure a similar level of vicarious fame has to be a tad more far-reaching. Which is where you come in, people. I'd like as many of you as possible to go to Wikipedia. Select the entry for a random individual, and insert the following piece of text in an appropriate slot:

"He/she was also one of the alien voices in the Cadbury's Smash advertisements in the 1970s."

I suppose it would make sense to restrict yourself to people who were alive at the time, but that's not compulsory. If you like, you can come back and tell me who you've done, but again, you may wish to maintain an air of mystery about the whole thing (which will also make it harder for the Wikipolice to track things down). Please feel free to get your friends, virtual or otherwise, into the project; the more attempts we make, the more likely one is to slip through the Jungian bullshit detector and become a fragment of reality, or the nearest we get to it these days.

8 comments:

Billy said...

Are we allowed to do it to your wikipedia entry, Tim?

Because I've only just noticed you have one you see.

Mangonel said...

You have a Wikipedia entry! How 'A' list!

FirstNations said...

dare me not, my darling, because I WILL DO IT.

serious?

really?

Tim Footman said...

Feel free, Billy.

Hardly A-list, Mangonel. I suspect it was started as a joke. Which makes this current project especially appropriate.

Go for it, FN. Start with L. Ron.

Christopher Campbell-Howes said...

This is a bit of a slap in the face for those of us who actually did the alien voices in the Smash adverts. You may be hearing from Alan Knotts' and my solicitors.

Tim Footman said...

Can one be sued for a sin of omission, Christopher?

Murph said...

I went to do Jacques Brel but someone got there before me.

Tim Footman said...

And Ruth Madoc as well, Murph. But no more.

Well, that went well.